Monday, 16 March 2009

Ronald MacDonald = Anglobitch

Since the dawn of time, many a wise man has asked himself, "Why do women insist on plastering their faces with paint?"

From the Anglobitch perspective, it is clear that most Anglo-American women believe that painting their pinched, squash-alley faces will make them more alluring. Anglo-American females frequently apply cherry-red smiles to their muffin lips; eye-shadow to accentuate their piggy eyes; and, last but not least, blusher to hide their deathly pallor. Now, which corporate celebrity also decorates himself this way?

You got it: Ronald MacDonald.

Who told these cretins that resembling a cheese-burger vending clown would make them look attractive? It must have been the same person who told them that pachyderm Permatans or bottle-blonde hair are alluring: a complete idiot, probably blind.

However, although this 'Ronald Look' might be a (failed) attempt to hide the Anglobitch's true appearance, in fact it reveals her. For the Anglobitch is truly a figure of fun.

At thirty, used and dried up, struggling with sociopathic kids fathered by long-departed, knuckle-dragging losers ('Bad Boys!'), the Anglobitch is a clown in all but name. She trawls the dating sites, looking for Mr Solvent to rescue her: but Mr Solvent is single, free and childless (and probably banging fresh young chicks every night). All the Anglobitch has to offer is her shrivelled cunt, a burden of debt, three fuck-wit kids and high-maintenance expectations.

Mmmmm, I'm lovin' it! Is it any wonder Anglo-American marriage rates are at an all-time low?


  1. Hello Muzalon.

    You know, the ideal woman is a corpse. The best place to meet and date a compatible female sex partner is the funeral parlour. That said, I would rather be in the company of a female corpse than a living female. As a matter of fact, a female corpse is much kinder, gentler, wiser, and more sympathetic and extraverted than any living female I know. If men knew the advantages of being with a female corpse, especially one that has recently died, I believe that men in droves would marry and date female corpses. Did you know that when a young woman passes away, she leaves a beautiful corpse that is highly receptive to all manner of sexual overtures? I would rather take sexual advantage of a female corpse and make her my maggot-infested, decomposing corpse bride, then touch any living woman. In fact, I've become quite the promiscuous slut with my dead female corpses. A live, nubile female should only be approached with a knife or a loaded pistol, only because they produce such beautiful corpses!

  2. I realize beauty is only skin deep but ulgy American women make me want to vomit!

  3. McDonalds clown evolved from a clown of all things. A clown is a joker and his purpose is to be funny by being silly. This is the first McDonalds Commercial
    Makeup has been used for thousands of years by women but in Victorian times it was associated with prostitutes and actresses, usually thought of as one and the same. There are two things I see women try to do with makeup and other props. One is to look younger or older and generally more attractive. Another is to look more wealthy with various props, like expensive handbags, clothes, etc. In Asia and other ancient cultures have used skin whitening for this purpose too, to appear more wealthy. This thing to look more wealthy is more interesting to me and worthy of more discussion. All of this has one thing in common as it is a general form of deception, to fool others into thinking they are something they are not.

  4. Here is another witty observation about women, in this case Japanese women in the bar scene:
    If she looks over 22 she's 15
    If she looks 15 she's 28
    If she looks 28 she's over 40
    It's not about western women but still the common theme of deception with the extensive use of makeup and props.

  5. Excellent, 100% correct, its one of mankind mysteries